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Podcast #24: Anal Play


In this episode we talk with Eva Blake, a certified sexological body worker, about all things anal play. A lot of people out there (both ‘inserters’ and ‘insertees’) are drawn to anal play but find themselves a bit unsure of where to begin, what to expect and how to do it. In this podcast, Eva answers all these questions and then some. What positions work best? How to do it safely? What kinds of sensations can you expect? All shall be revealed.

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CFNM Cock & Tail Party

Come for a night of drinks and kinky CFNM fun at the Cock & Tail Bar

In ye olde times*, legend has it that tired, kinky travelers would stumble across an ancient watering hole, hidden away in a valley in the desert. That lost and mysterious tavern’s name: the Cock & Tail Bar.

It was a wondrous place where tough and determined men of a submissive bent would shed their garments and their pride. They would stand sunburnt and vulnerable (and kind of ridiculous looking) before dominant women who knew exactly what they wanted. This usually involved ordering said naked guys to shake their cocks and tails (ye olde lingo for asses) around in a humiliating fashion while mixing elaborate drinks, complete with tiny umbrellas.

And so in one moment in history the cocktail and the CFNM (clothed female naked male) party was born. Time passed. The kinky watering hole was lost to the desert sands and to legend. Then one day, two out-of-towners stumbled across an old, old bar, half buried beneath the desert sands of San Diego.

It was THE bar – the exact same bar, complete with sexy attachment points, which had led many a submissive man to his naked (but secretly pretty damn enjoyable) shame. That’s right. We found the Cock & Tail Bar of legend, and we want to invite you, weary traveler, to come break it in with us! (Wait till you see it – it’s freaking spectacular). :P

You are cordially invited to come join us for a CFNM (Clothed Female / Naked Male) cocktail party at our new home.

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Podcast #23: KinkFest!


In this episode we share our impressions of KinkFest, an amazing few days of all things kink which we recently both attended in Portland. Guys, this event was ridiculously fun and enlightening and we recommend the hell out of it!

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Podcast #22: Shame! What is it good for?


(Absolutely Nothing!)

In this podcast we get the ball rolling by talking about Kinkfest, a big kink event coming up in Portland. We’re both really, really, really, really excited about this event. (Really). We talk through some of the events they have lined up and generally enthuse about the “infamous” parties in our near future. If you are going to this event, look us up! We’d love to catch up for a drink. If you aren’t going to this event, consider going to this event! You can find a registration form here. But Hurry, the deadline is 18 March.

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Podcast #21: How To Write A Post (without it blowing up in your face)


This podcast is about how to write a post on a kink forum without the whole thing blowing up in your face. I know it sounds a bit negative, but a lot of people out there have been burnt by a negative reaction to a post submitted in an online forum like Fetlife, She Makes The Rules or even this site. Now don’t get us wrong – we think that the resources available to learn and talk about kink online are amazing and valuable. If you are new to kink (or even if you aren’t) one of the best ways to get the most out of life is to learn from other people and to get involved in communities of like minded people online.

The thing is, to get the best result and to avoid big, nasty unpleasantness you need to do it right. Get it wrong and there’s a good chance you could find yourself on the explody end of a blog grenade of insults, criticism and general bad karma. Life’s too short for this kind of unpleasantness! In this podcast episode, AlphaDomme gives you the scoop on three things you can do to minimize your risk of a kaboom moment.

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Podcast #20: Fun With Pervertibles


In this podcast we talk about the chaotic, kinky frenzied fun of playing with pervertibles. ‘What are these pervertemawatchits of which you speak?’ I hear you ask with jowl-wobbling indignation. It’s easy really. Pervertibles are pretty much anything. Glad I could clear that up for you! Pervertibles are, in essence, any household “thing” that has been repurposed (or perverted if you will) to be a kink toy. The beauty of kink is that you can get creative. Sure you can spend thousands of dollars at your local kink store purchasing everything that inserts, inflates and incapacitates … or you could just raid your kitchen drawers! That is what this podcast is all about: having fun with the stuff you have to hand.

In the interests of academic rigor (and just because she likes being mean to me) in this podcast AlphaDomme demonstrates the usage of several such home items on me, and I in turn offer thoughtful critique by saying “aaargh!” at varying pitches and levels of wimpishness. The show notes below are intended to be a handy catalog to spark your own ideas. Have fun! And we would love to hear about your pervertible adventures.

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Podcast #19: Twenty Questions On Sadism


We really had fun recording this one! Four dominant ladies at different points along the sadism continuum agreed to sit down and record a frank and fearless discussion about sadism: how it works, how it looks and how it feels. The discussion was amazingly candid and revealed some fascinating variations and contrasts in what it means to have a sadistic streak.

… We also met Gordon the Magnificent, but that’s too complicated to go into right now.

If you’ve listened to a few Men Submit podcasts, you will most likely have got the memo by now that we are about the “real deal.” By that I mean that we focus on how to make those sexy kinky dreams fit into real, actual lives where real, actual people do real, actual things… like getting sick, or taking the kids to soccer practice or arguing over whether to watch Dances with Wolves or Beaches. You get the idea.

But even if it isn’t always about whips and chains … *cue darkly ominous voice* sometimes it is…

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Why are we kinky? And does it matter?

Some of us spend a lot of time trying to figure out why we are the way that we are. We want to know why we like kink and why we are kinky.  Was it because of something we experienced in our youth?  Some mental or abuse issue? Why are we the way that we are?

I fall into the nature camp.  While I don’t discount the role of nurture, trauma, and any other effects on our lives, I’m a strong believer in nature.  I tend not to spend a lot of time ruminating on why I am the way that I am, but more time in being comfortable with myself and working on any negative issues that come up.

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Dominant Woman: How to message them the right way

Are you looking for a special dominant woman for a female led relationship?  Do you ever struggle with what to say to women when you are messaging them for the first time?  Or do you send messages out but never hear anything back?   There are a lot of submissive men out there and fewer dominant women.  So how do you successfully reach out to a dominant woman?

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Finding Your Domme: A Practical Guide

Finding Your Domme: Kink guide

So many men out there are desperate to meet a kinky and dominant woman, or a “domme.” But it is hard! Most submissive men will have their work cut out for them to find the kinky, dominant woman of their dreams. There are a lot of possible reasons for this. Men can feel uncertain about the “rules” of dating in the kink world. They may be unsure how to build an effective online presence. In fact there a whole range of potential pitfalls to avoid. Wouldn’t be great if a practical, sensible guide existed to make the process of meeting a domme easier? Well, now there is!

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